Странновщина

Обычный день. Алина, надев свои лучшие стринги и носки из гандонов пошла в бар. Она хотел заказать самый лучший cumпот и поговорить со своими друзьями, которых нет. За окном маленькие фурри-дети лепят снеговика летом, из остатков марихуанны. На заднем фоне играла музыка Инсташалавки, а Алина увидела какой-то странный памятник девушке с сиськами. Выпив cumпот она пошла делать всякое говно. Потом она вспомнила, что сегодня выходной, сегодня запланирована стопроцентовнегейскаятуса у Ани. Она решил купить чипсы доритос, а так же взять маунтиринду, спелых яблок, груш и чай Якубовича. А так же что б не быть геем взяла презервативы. Позвонила Аня. Она сказал: "Так, педик, как у тебя дела, короче туса сегодня будет раньше, а точнее через час. Будет несколько горячих девочек и пара мужиков для неформалов. ". Алина решила, что времени еще много и пошла подрочить на подушку. Кончив в подушку, она понял, что прошел 1 час и одна секунда и она поняла, что ему надо бежать на стопроцентовнегейскуютусу. Когда она пришла на стопроцентовнегейскуютусу она увидела, что все секс-игрушки тусят, но без Ани. Тогда она решила пойти искать её. Алина идёт на кухню и видит ебушихся солдатов и батю Насти, и подумав "ничего необычного" она идёт в зал и видит мелких пиздюков изрисовавшие комиксы Ани. Отпиздив пиздюков Алина идёт в комнату Ани и видит левитирующий искусственный божественный хуй. "Норм" – подумала Алина и идёт в ванную, в которой Максима ебёт целая стая мужиков из греко-римской бырбыр. "Насте бы понравилось" – проговаривает про себя Алина и думает где может быть Аня. "Ладно, пойду поищу на улице" – говорит она, но... "А?!" Из комнаты Ани её хватает какая-та щупальца. Оказывается эта щупальца вылезла из портала, который образовал божественный хуй. Щупальца затягивает Алину в портал и он закрывается. Алина попала в какое-то тёмное помещение с вентилятором, металлическими дверьми, рядом с кнопками, по бокам, плакатом с какими-то роботизированными животными ростом 2 метра и красным стационарным телефоном. Алина встает с пола, на котором до этого лежала, и осматривается. Щупальца нигде нет. Воняет пиццей. Прохладно. Какой-то долбаёб ходит по коридорам и распевает оперные песни не открывая рта. Алина стоит в ахеревшем состоянии, ведь поняла куда попола. "мешок Фреде? " – говорит она, видимо ещё отойдя от переноса через портал. "Пять ночей у мешутки? " – сказанула она. "Куча дерьма, скатившаяся после 4 части? " – правдиво сказала она. 27 января Алина нажимает на кнопку рядом с дверью. "Пшёл нах" – сказала она увидев ушастого додика и закрыв дверь. Она подходит к другой двери и нажимает на кнопку там. "Нехуёво, но иди нах" – сказала она, увидев пизду с клювом, и опять закрывая дверь. Она крутится на стуле и нихуя больше не делает. Вдруг звонит телефон. "Але" – говори Алина, взяв трубку. "Может двери откроешь? " – слышится из телефона. "Захуя? " – говорит Алина. "Дура блять. Ты щас всю энергию потратишь! Как я дрочить без порно то буду?!" *Бросает трубку* *Не, реально бросает, да так что телефон разбивается нахуй* Вдруг в коридоре слышится быстрое топанье ногами, как будто кто-то бежит. Топот остановился и начался грохот от стука в дверь. Алина подходит к двери. "Кто? " "Ты нах мой телефон сломала?!" "Не ебу" "А я ебу..... тебя. " "Ну мозги так точно" Вдруг свет выключается, а двери открываются. В противоположной двери начинает играть оперная хрень, а Алина слышит как а неё замахивается тот самый хуй, который до этого ебал ей мозги. Алина уварачивается, и тот хуй попадает в рот мишке. Свет включается. Егор Демьяненко Егор Демьяненко 17:07 Алина видит что этот хуй – это Клаксон Максон, а Мишка – Анюта блядюта. Анюта жует голову Клаксона. Наверно вкусно. Лицо Анюты изображает полное блаженство, как у кошки от валерьянки. Смотря на всё это действо, Алина просто уходит чтоб не мешать этой идиллии. Алина идёт. Идёт Идёт Прыгает Бежит Катится Ползёт Едет....каким-то образом Летит Наркоманка? Ну да. Короче блять. Алина без безцельно бродит по пиццерии и видит ту самую пизду с клювом, которую Алина проигнорировала, закрыв перед ней дверь. Пизда с клювом подходит к Алине и говорит: "Ну и чё это была за херня? ". "О, Настя" – говорит Алина. Не знаю как, но Алина узнала Настю в этой Пизде с клювом. "Ты нахера дверь закрыла?!" "Когда увидишь такую Пизду с клювом и не такое сделаешь" Что правда – то правда. Егор Демьяненко Егор Демьяненко 17:21 "Но всё равно бля..... бле" На время Пизду с клювом перекосило и она выплюнула женскую руку. "Это чё нах? " – логично задаёт вопрос Алина. "Рука" – уже не настолько логично но логично ответила Пизда с клювом. "Чё она у тебя делает!?" "Ну а хули у неё маник лучше моего!?" "Да блять! " – какой-то рандомный чел кричит из коридора. Из коридора вылетает что-то прямо в Пизду с клювом, и она улетает в пиздаляндию, то есть в сральник. Из коридора выходит фигура. "Заебала со своими ногтями. " – говорит фигура. "А ты кто? " – всё так же логично задаёт вопрос Алина. "... " "Что? " – невероятно логично задаёт вопрос Алина "Эту Пизду ты узнала, а меня нет? " "Ага" – Ультра логично отвечает Алина. "Ег... бле" Его чё-то жмыхнуло и он не договорил. "Егрек? " – УЛЬТРАСУПЕРМЕГА логично говорит Алина. "Вообще-то... " "Егрек" – ГИГАСУПЕРБЛЯТЬАЧЕШУИЕЛЬНОНЕВЕРОЯНОБЛЯЗДЕЦНАСКОЛЬКОЖЕЭТОРЕАЛЬНО логично перебивает Алина. "Ладно-ладно. Егрек – это Егрек" – нелогично смерился Егрек. Вдруг звенит какой-то колокольчик. "О" – Окает Егрек. "Это чё? "- ну вы сами поняли на сколько логично говорит это Алина. Резко к Алине и Егреку сходятся Анюта блядюта, Клаксон с головой во рту Анюты, Пизда с клювом. Они все становятся в линейку, по середине которой зажата с двух сторон Алина. Все эти выродки покланяются, а Алина смачно врезается в пол, поднимает голову и видит занавес, который раскрывается. Занавес раскрывается и начинает виднеться меленькая сцена, на которой стоит какая-то худощавая фигура. "Ку ёпта" – невероятно логично говорит эта фигура. "Чё? " – астачертительно логично говорит Алина. Худая фигура начинает говорить: "Ебать. Давайте Ебать её. " "Хорошо, Алень. " "эээээ. а ну нахуй идите. И почему олень через "А"? " "Во-первых, мы туда и идём. Во-вторых, это имя этого дистрофика – Алень" – говоря аниматроники. Алина быстро отбегает от этих хуил. "Алень?...... это я? " – ахуеть как логично показывает Алина показывает на аниматроника – дистрофика. "Ебать. да ты гений. Давайте ебать её" "нееееееее. Хуй вам" "Ну так дай его нам" "Рог в жопе не вырастет? " – логично говорит Алина "У нас здесь ФНаФ а не МФ" "А ну да" Короче блять. Алину загнали в угол. "Ну так чем будем её ебать? " "Я ХЗ" "Обычно в таких фанфиках трахательные аппараты уже встроены" "Не ломай 4-ую стену" Аниматронники посмотрели на Алину, которая вдруг стала вся красной, как помидор, а щёки её как будто готовы в любой момент взорваться. "Это чё с ней? " "Не ебу. Давайте ебать" "Давай" И тут внезапно...... Готовьтесь к взрыву 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Она начинает говорить: "бля" – БЛЯКАКЖЕОНАКЛАССНОЭТОСКАЗАЛАЭТОПРОСТОАХУИТЕЛЬНОНАСТОЛЬКОЧТОЯЩАСОБКАНЧАЮСЬПРЯМОЗДЕСЬНАСТОЛЬКООНАКРУТОЭТОСКАЗАЛААЕСЛИТЫСОМНЕВАЕЩСЯТОТЫЛОХИПИДРПОТОМУЧТОЭТОРЕАЛЬНОАХУИТЕЛЬНОУЛЬТРАСУПЕРГИГАМЕГАГИПЕРБУПЕРПУПЕРКАКАХЕРИТЕЛЬНОПРОСТОАХЕРЕЕШЬВЕДЬДАЖЕЭТАГЛАВАНЕНАСТОЛЬКОРУТАКАКТОКАКОНАЭТОСКАЗАЛАЭТОБЫЛОПИЗДЕЦКАККЛУТОЯХОЧУЧТОБЭТААХЕРННОСТЬЗАЖАЛАМЕНЯМЕЖДУНОГИКАКСЛЕДУЕТСЛОМАЛАШЕЮАПОТОМПЕРЕШЛАНАРЁБРААЗАТЕМДОНОГКОТОРЫЕБУДУТСВЯЗАННЫСАМИМИСОБОЙКАКМАКОРОНЕНЫВМЕСТЕСПАЛЬЦАМИИИМЕННОНАСТОЛЬКОЭТО логично сказала она. От такой логичности аниматроники взорвались и собрались обратно. "э бля это чё было?!" "Не ебу. А давайте еб... " "НЕТ! " Короче блять. просто взяли Егрека, который написал на своём пузе: "открывается портал" Тут же открывается портал. "Всё. пиздуй!.... пожалуйста" – умоляюще произнёс Алень. Аниматроники взяли Алину и швырнули в портал. Алина опять оказалась в квартире Ани. "О, вот ты где" – Сказала Аня увидев Алину. "Ага" -....... короче очень логично сказала Алина. "Ну чё, пошли смотреть видосики по ФНаФу? " "НЕТ! " – очень логично крикнула Алина. "Ок. Тогда... " Аня достаёт божественный хуй. "Иди сюды" – с извращённым лицом сказала Аня. "ААААААА" – логично кричит Алина.